Saturday, August 1, 2009

Can you see the angst? Nope...didn't think so!

Continuum 36x36 2008

My art mentor/coach always teases that even my "angry" or "angst filled" paintings end up looking "lovely". I am always drawn to the abstract expressionists that fill their work with lots of tension and emotion....but for me -( and I guess I do this in real life )- I feel the need to edit it out and "make-nice". My coach and I have had many lengthy discussions about this tendency with my work. Discussing this with him is much more fun (and way cheaper) than therapy- but it disturbs me. And the truth of the matter is that I have in fact worked through some serious emotions with my painting in the last several years.

So ...present day: I have had a really anxiety filled summer -but I've also been painting and painting and painting - I have done a lot of work! And yet what I see when I look at all of this new work is the same thing I always see. Everything is soft, subtle, not at all angry looking or angst riddled. No...they are peaceful, non-tension filled lovely little paintings. Even though I really, truly use painting as my therapy. Trust me, the anxiety is IN THERE. I guess no one can see it but me.... and if they really looked "pissed-off" or "tragic" or "angst-filled" would I even like them? So I often wonder ...How authentic is this work? Deep...right?

(Can't you see it? LOL )

1 comment:

Sheree Rensel said...

Gosh, This is a "like minds" thing here. I was thinking about this topic a lot in the past weeks. I am wondering WHY I feel so much anger. I wake up in the moring outraged. Why? I have no clue. I also wondered why this is not being showcased in my current work. Am I afraid? Do I want to hide it? I think the only piece I have ever made that comes close to expressing some of my latent ourtrage is the piece (ironically titled) "ANGER".
I know this painting did the trick. However, I also know I have a bunch more of these in me. Too bad so many people want HAPPY art! LOL LOL LOL